Not Quite What It Seems To Be
by Dragna Vey
Summary: It has something to do with Kakashi and Iruka but oddly enough, it's not Kakairu (gasp!).
1. Female Infestation

**Disclaimer**: Not mine, 'nuf said. 

**Spoiler**: To be on the safe side, this story takes place after Volume 04 - Chapter 34 which is right after the Zabuza-Haku Arc (for lack of a better title). 

**Warning!** English is not my first language so please take note of the mistakes that you might spot here are not intentional in any or all ways possible. I don't have a beta-reader and I'm only relying solely on my Microsoft Word and Lotus Word Pro to check on my Grammar, Spellings, whatever... 

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He would have gladly face an army of other hidden villages shinobies out to get his blood. 

He would have been ecstatic to fight an archenemy whose only wish in life was to kill him and be done with it. 

He would readily and without complain eat Naruto's cooking, no matter how frighteningly nauseating his foods may be. 

Right now however, all those will just remain as wishful thinking for him as he valiantly tried to get away from the clutches of females that currently contaminated every corner of his apartment. 

Females whom he had never spoken to before but was well aware of their existence through his association with Kurenai, Asuma's fiancée. Kurenai kept on delivering him chains of love letters addressed to him with poor Kurenai being the middle person by some unknown females. He was under the impression that they were a sorry lot; shy and timid and easily excitable by any signs of acceptance by the love of their lives. 

All that was shattered by the time he opened the door to his lone apartment; he had expected to see his dirty bachelor pad, highly uninhabitable by any other human beings beside himself. 

Instead, he saw a clean and gleaming floor, smelling of spring flowers so wrongly out of place during this time of mellow autumn season. Pastel-colored drapes, the sweet baby blue type, swaying gently by the wind that had swept inside through the opened window (how he had missed that particularity was beyond his comprehension at the moment). 

No dust of any sorts littered anywhere within his sharp line of vision, convincing him immediately that someone had virtually scrubbed the whole place out. He had walked inside his own apartment with a cautiousness that rivaled the time when he was still an active member of the Anbu squad. 

He observed each and every little thing and he noted that each and every little thing that was previously owned by him had already disappeared from sight; it had probably already ended up in a dustbin at the back of the apartment building. It was a thought that was not easily accepted to him. 

His sensitive ears picked out a sound, a very worrying sound to him. 

Someone had giggled. 

It was a girlish giggle. Soon, there were two more and then, three and... 

The light switched on (he had neglected to do so earlier, not realizing that the room had darkened considerably), and to his horror, a group of heavily make-up, scantily clad women, came out of his room, the kitchen, and every other hiding place imaginable all were rushing up to him. 

Without a doubt, he noted that they were all beautiful and to some extend, cute and pretty. And they were all clinging to him shouting and screaming his name like he was an idol or something to that extend. It was supposed to be his wet dreams come true yet it was also a harrowing frightening experience. 

_Where had they all come from? And how the hell did they know where I live?_

It was enough for him to make a crucial last-minute decision that would ensure his continuing survival. With every ounce of strength within him, he focussed himself to wrench away out of the clutches of these unknown females...and ran like hell away from his apartment. 

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**Useless ranting: **This started out as a personal challenge to create a story where Kakashi and Iruka are ... Friends. Just friends. Platonically friends. And writing this story from a Kakairu fan like me is surprisingly easy. Refrain from asking me why, I just find it easy. Anyway, I've also wrote another story but this time, it's a definite Kakairu (teeheehee). "The Love Letter" starring Gai will definitely be continued. Actually, I've already finished three chapters for it but I couldn't bring myself to post it coz I wasn't happy with it. Dunno why. Oh well... 


	2. The Pitiful Visitor

**Disclaimer**: Not mine, 'nuf said. 

**Spoiler**: To be on the safe side, this story takes place after Volume 04 - Chapter 34 which is right after the Zabuza-Haku Arc (for lack of a better title). 

**Warning!** English is not my first language so so please take note of the mistakes that you might spot here are not intentional in any or all ways possible. I don't have a beta-reader and I'm only relying solely on my Microsoft Word and Lotus Word Pro to check on my Grammar, Spellings, whatever... 

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When Iruka opened his door that night at 11:14, he had expected something important had happened. Because of this urgency, he had nearly spilled the bottle of ink unto the parchment he was writing on; the monthly report of his students' performance to be handed over to Hokage-sama for inspection. 

His clumsiness continued on when he accidentally stubbed his toe to the chair's leg and nearly knocking down the high piles of his students' papers that had been stacked neatly at the edge of his table. 

One can only imagine how he feels when he opened the door only to find a leaning Kakashi with the sorriest-looking face a man can muster. Frankly, Iruka was not exactly ecstatic seeing the Jounin at this time of night. In fact, he was more than ready to slam the door back into its proper state and lock and bolt it tightly from the unwanted element that was Kakashi. 

Kakashi was not perturbed by the scowl that his future host currently wear on his face. He leaned forward, well into Iruka's private zone and clasped his hands together in a pathetic gesture of hopelessness. 

"Can I stay here tonight?" 

_The hell you can!_ Was what Iruka dearly wanted to say but the pitiful sight of the Jounin in front of him stopped him in his tracks. He scowled still but he let the man enter his humble abode without a word. Kakashi happily complied and stepped inside. 

It was a tidy place that he had entered, clean and clear of any rubbish or dust of sorts. Just as he would have anticipated. He turned around to see the other man who had looked at him with a raised brow and arms that crossed his chest. He was waiting for an explanation. 

He opened his mouth, with the noble intention of telling the younger man what had happened but it was his empty stomach that had sounded out pathetically. Iruka rolled his eyes and told him to sit down while he fixes him something to eat. 

"It's not instant ramen, is it?" 

He had asked, neglecting Iruka's order to sit down as he sauntered into the kitchen, another extension of tidiness that he had come to expect from Iruka's house. The younger man looked up and shook his head in disgust. 

"How anyone can eat that, I will never know! And no, it's not. I'm going to cook for you something that's easy for me to do so and clean up later." 

Kakashi sighed in relief. He had been meaning to eat at a ramen place after he had ran away from his female-infested apartment but found out that he was, unfortunately, running low on cash. 

He had ended up walking, for two solid hours, around Konoha village with no particular purpose in mind except finding a place to settle for the night...and get a free meal at the same time before coming to knock on Asuma's door. 

He looked around while the younger man cooked his dinner and opened a few cabinets to look inside it, just out of curiosity and such. 

"Don't you have any leftovers or something?" 

"I only cook enough for myself. Besides, it's not like I had expected anyone to come tonight." 

He glared at Kakashi who was currently perusing the counter, basically checking out his kitchen like a self-appointed Health Inspector. Kakashi had merely shrugged after hearing his explanation. Iruka was true to his words about being quick though, the delicious smell of his dinner had immediately wafted to his nose and plunge straight into his stomach where it continued to growl hungrily in response. 

At least he had the grace to blush as Iruka rolled his eyes and pour out the puree-like broth into a large bowl and carried it out to the table, Kakashi in tow behind him. 

He ate in silence while Iruka cleaned everything up in the kitchen; he didn't take long to do that too and soon, he joined Kakashi at the table and watched him eat, joining in the silence that remain unbroken. It was the companionable sort of silence, the type where everyone feels comfortable not saying anything at all. 

"How do you know where I live?" 

Iruka asked him out of the blue. His face redden a bit, thinking he may have been rude in his haste. Kakashi didn't seem to mind it though. 

Finishing off the broth that Iruka had so graciously made for him (he ought to ask for the recipe later), he leaned back. He placed his mask back into its proper place and though his face was now partly hidden behind the black half-mask, it was clear to see that he was contemplating on how to answer that question. He wouldn't want Iruka to get the wrong idea now, would he? 

"I don't. I honestly don't know where you live." 

He paused and drank his glass of plain water before continuing on with the true reason he was out of his house in the first place. Iruka's eyes rarely blink when he told him the truth behind it all. When he had finished his story, Iruka was already sporting a _Get outta here!_ look. Kakashi had been expecting that one as well. 

"I thought you'd be at Asuma-sensei's place or Gai-sensei's perhaps?" 

"I was, at Asuma's place. Mind you, I wouldn't go near Gai's place even if you buy me a whole set of 'Come Come Paradise' to do so." 

He stopped, immediately remembering his precious collection that he had kept so lovingly well and preserved on his desk. He knew not the fate that had befallen his books, but he hoped to Kami-sama that those women had not seen any of it...or touched any of it. A wishful thinking for his part, seeing as how they had scrubbed his place up until it was sparkling clean. 

No, his complete collection and 'Come Come Paradise' and his growing collection of 'Come Come Violence' are doomed. Completely and utterly doomed. That morbid thought caused a slight pang to his heart. 

Iruka, in the meantime, was completely ignorant of the anguished look that Kakashi was briefly wearing and was instead pondering at what he had just said. He was set to ask why he didn't want to go to Gai's place but thought better of it. Who hadn't heard about the (in)famous rivalry between him and Gai anyway? He guessed that he had a good reason not to go there and proceeded to listen to the rest of Kakashi's answer. 

"I was there and I had planned to stay the night there but I couldn't do it. Not with Kurenai around. It just doesn't feel right, butting into the couple's private time." 

He nodded in agreement. It would be awkward indeed for Kakashi to stay there when Asuma and Kurenai wanted to be alone. He would be like an unwanted third-wheel in Asuma's house. 

"So I asked them if they know anywhere else I could go to." 

_"What about Gai?"_

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_Kakashi gave Kurenai the 'Are you kidding?' look by which Kurenai immediately slapped her forehead in response. She smiled sheepishly at him after that while Kakashi continued drinking his tea. Asuma was thinking silently, not noticing the ashes falling off the tip of his cigarette. It was obvious when he did that, it was almost funny._

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_"Ibiki?"_

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_"Too far."_

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_"Anko?"_

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_"Out of the question."_

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_"Tried Genma?"_

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_"Too, too far."_

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__"And it continued on until Kurenai mentioned you." 

Iruka looked pleased hearing that. Kakashi thought for a while whether to tell him that Kurenai was no longer available and that Asuma would give him one hell of an ass-kicking if he ever found out about him liking his precious fiancée. 

In the end, he let it slide though. Iruka may be a bit naive sometimes but even Kakashi had to grudgingly agree that he's not that stupid as to attempt to do so. 

Still, Kakashi had the most insane urge to wipe that goofy smile off his face. Only the thought that Iruka had already fed him and had graciously allowed him to spend the night at his place stopped him from doing so. The thought remained a tempting one, however. 

"So she told me how to get here and here I am. There." 

Iruka stroked his chin and contemplated for a while. What he was contemplating, Kakashi had no idea and he didn't need to know. He left Iruka to his own musings as he got up from his seat and absent-mindedly stretched himself out, his eyes scanning the interior of Iruka's modest living room. 

He noted that while it was one of the cleanest rooms he had ever been into, it was also definitely one of the most boring-looking rooms he had ever been into as well; there was not much to see, only a few potted green plants, an aquarium, a couple of framed watercolor paintings of Konoha village from an aerial view. 

Boring as it may be, he would never tell that to his host's face while he's staying there now, would he? 

He turned around and regarded the other man still sitting down on the chair. He was still stroking his chin with that distant look on his face. Kakashi rolled his eyes and tapped his shoulder. Iruka faced him slowly with a brow raised and a silent _What?_ that seemed to be emanating from him without speaking. 

"Do you have an extra towel?" 

He stared at him for a while and got up and went straight to his room. Moments later, he emerged carrying not only an extra towel, but also a shirt, a pair of pants and a new bar of soap. 

Kakashi accepted all that and made a small sound of approval. But a wild and hilarious thought unexpectedly occurred to him and he had to ask, despite the risk of being booted out of his only shelter for tonight. 

"What? No boxer shorts?" 

A madly blushing and spluttering Iruka shoved him straight into the bathroom, all the while cursing the Jounin for being such a pain in the ass. Kakashi merely grinned and proceeded to take his shower. 

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**Useless ranting**: So frustrating!!! Sometimes I REALLY hate Final Fantasy X!!! ARGHHH!!!!! 


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